Bullying can feel overwhelming, but you have more control than you think.

You are not alone. About 1 in 5 students report being bullied. It can feel confusing, frustrating, or even isolating. Those feelings are valid and you deserve support. The most important thing is knowing what actually works in the moment, how to protect yourself, and when to get help.

How to Deal With Bullies: What Actually Works

This guide gives you clear, practical steps you can use right away.

What Is Bullying?

Bullying is more than someone being mean once.

Bullying usually involves:

• Repeated negative and mean behavior
• A power imbalance (social, physical, or emotional)
• Intent to hurt, embarrass, or exclude

Types of bullying include:

• Verbal (persistent name-calling, teasing)
• Social (rumors, exclusion)
• Physical (hitting, pushing)
• Cyberbullying (texts, social media, group chats)

What to Do When You’re Being Bullied

When bullying happens, your goal is simple:  Don’t fuel the behavior.
Stay calm, stay safe, and stay in control: Take deep breaths and try not to let the bully get under your skin.

Not every bullying situation is the same. Here’s how to decide what to do:

• If you feel unsafe → go to a safe place and get help immediately
• If it’s verbal or social → walk away or use a calm response
• If it keeps happening → document it and tell an adult
• If it’s online → don’t respond to it, report it! Print it out, block the bully and delete the post.

1. Walk Away

One of the most effective things you can do when being confronted by a bully is to walk away. Walking away doesn’t mean you’re weak; it means you’re in control. 

• DO NOT engage with the bully
• Turn your body (not just your head) and leave calmly
• Keep your pace steady as you walk away
• Go somewhere specific, to a classroom, group, or safe space
• If the bully follows you move directly toward an adult, friends, or into a more public space

Why it works:
Bullying often continues when it gets attention. Walking away removes that reward.

2. Use a Calm, Confident Comeback

You might hear advice about using comebacks. The most effective ones aren’t sarcastic or hurtful; they’re calm, confident, and help you stay in control. The goal isn’t to “win” the moment. It’s to end the interaction and protect your space.

If you can’t walk away, or if the person continues, use a calm, confident comeback to set a boundary and end the interaction.

Keep it short, direct, and in control:
 

• “Stop.”
• “Enough.”
• “That’s not okay.”
• “Leave me alone.”
• “Let’s move on.”

You can also use simple comebacks depending on the situation:
 

If someone keeps bothering you:
“I said stop.”

If someone is trying to get a reaction:
“I’m not doing this.”
“This is getting old.”

If someone is making comments about you:
“I don’t care.”
“Why are you talking to me?”

If someone is repeating behavior:
“Here we go again. I’m done.”

If someone is trying to embarrass you:
“Enough. Stop.”

Additional Ways to Handle the Situation
 

If you feel safe, you can also:

• Walk away when the person approaches you and don’t engage
• Focus your attention elsewhere to avoid reacting
• Say “STOP” clearly, then walk away without turning back
• Keep your body language calm and confident, even if you don’t feel that way inside.

TIPS:

• Use a steady voice. Keep it brief. Don’t argue, insult, or try to “win” the moment.
• Some responses may not sound strong or confident, and that’s okay. What matters most is that they help end the interaction, not continue it.
• You don’t need the perfect response. You just need one that helps you set a boundary and move on.
• If your voice shakes or you feel nervous, that’s okay. What matters is keeping it short and not engaging further.

3. Stay Near Others

Bullies are less likely to continue when others are around. When there's a crowd around, they tend to back off because they don't want to lose control or get caught being mean. It's actually pretty empowering - if you stand up for yourself and have friends who've got your back, the bully usually won't dare to mess with you.

• Move toward friends or groups
• Stay in visible, supervised areas

When to Get Immediate Help

Get help right away if:

• There are threats or violence
• You feel unsafe
• Bullying is affecting your mental health

You don't have to face this alone: Having friends, family, or a trusted adult on your side can make all the difference when dealing with bullying. They can provide emotional support, help you come up with a plan to stay safe, and encourage you to speak out against the bully. Don't be afraid to reach out! Talk to someone you trust:

• Tell an adult and follow up with them
• Parent or caregiver
• Teacher or school staff
• Coach or counselor

What NOT to Do When You're Being Bullied

When dealing with a bully, there are some things you should absolutely avoid doing:

• Don't try to reason with them or explain why they're being wrong. This can actually escalate the situation and make the bullying worse.  Avoid taking their bait and engaging in an argument - it's like playing into their hands.
• Never try to fight back or retaliate, as this can lead to physical harm and get you into trouble.
• Don't show a strong emotional reaction, stay calm, cool and in control.
• Don’t let them see that you are uset or try to handle it alone. Instead, walk away from the situation. If the behavior continues, calmly and confidently tell them to stop. If it doesn’t stop, reach out to a trusted adult for support.
• Never harm yourself. Bullying can feel overwhelming, but it is never a reason to hurt yourself. You deserve support, care, and to feel safe. If you’re struggling, reach out to a trusted adult, friend, or counselor. You are not alone, and there is help available.

Every day, students are facing bullying, harassment, and online harm;
often without support. Help us reach them before it escalates.